An Act of Assymetrical Caution

It was reported today that Venezuela's president, Hugo Chavez, has ordered the repatriation of his country's gold from storage in European vaults.

No doubt scrinched up sphincters like Senator Mitch McConnell will decry the act as the dastardly deed of an asymetrical terrorist, lunatic. But we wonder...

It certainly seems beyond the pale of short term probability that the United States is intending to invade Venezuela. So why would Chavez apprehend that the world's Righteous Constable would bring intense pressure to bear on its European allies to embargo Venezuela's gold, as they recently embargoed Libya's? One word: Iran.

Is this a whiff in the wind of Zio-Con desires to invade Iran? We hardly need clues from Chavez as to that; and that can hardly have been news to Chavez. But Iran and Venezuela do have commerical and military ties, agreed upon several years back. Of course, we can count on the U.S. press (and its stepinfechts in Europe) not to connect the dots. They, along with the senatorial sphincter, will palaver hotly about what a crazy man Chavez is.... made crazier of course by the chemo... But given the sanctions and pressure that have been brought to bear on Iran and which were this past week announced by the Great Obambi himself, the level-headed man in the equation is in Caracas.

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Blundering Goons Strike Again

One good outcome of the Occupy Wall Street protests is that Americans are (dimly) coming to understand the true face their rulers. This weekend another video went viral, as it showed a cop in riot gear blasting pepper spray into the faces of seated protesters at U.C. Davis, California

Explaining the use of chemical force, Charles J. Kelly, the lieutenant who wrote the department's use of force guidelines, told CBS News that pepper spray was a "compliance tool" that can be used on subjects who do not resist, and which is preferable to simply lifting protesters. "When you start picking up human bodies, you risk hurting them," Kelly said. "Bodies don't have handles on them."

Where exactly on the DSM-IV axis does Kelly’s mental disorder fall? What would anyone call a parent who used a “compliance tool” on a child that was not “non-compliant”? “Sack of Shit” is what comes to my mind, although it doesn’t sound very clinical.

To make matters worse, Kelly blandly proffers up a “rationale” that itself qualifies as pure bullshit. Does Kelly think normal people will fall for this crap? He does. Why not? Judges lap it all the time, in case after case on a daily basis.

Anyone who has any doubts need only attend a Fourth Amendment suppression hearing, (if any are being held anymore). If sober minded, impartial, professionally trained magistrates and Supreme Court justices find such justifications to be “reasonable” why shouldn’t the public?

One of the most constitutionally destructive statements ever uttered was Justice Cardozo’s moronic statement that excluding illegally seized evidence means "the criminal is to go free just because the constable blundered." (People v. Defore (1928) 242 N.Y. 13; 150 N.E. 585.)

There was no “blunder” in Defore. In that case, the officer arrested defendant, in a public place, on suspicion of petty theft (for which he was later acquitted). Without a warrant, he then entered and ransacked defendant’s private quarters as a result of which he seized an illegal blackjack.

Although intoned in the context of an illegal search, Cardozo’s Stupidity quickly entered American lore. Our police, ever valiant and ever true, don’t do evil or sadistic things ... they just ...uh... blunder.

They blunder on the stand. They call it “testilying”. They blunder in sworn affidavits. It’s called “mis-omissions.” They blunder into murder, “confusing” the grip of their gun for their tasers.

And when they cannot think up of a blunder on their own, the appellate courts of the country are there to help them conjure up fantasy “safety rationales” and other excuses aimed at justifying unrestrained police prerogative and brutality.

The public lapped it up too, never missing a chance to jump for a hobgloblin which proved the cheapest way for politicians to gain votes. The cry went up: “Don’t shackle the police!” After all, the Constitution is too good to “waste” on criminals.

A culture of indulged and excused brutality permeated our para-militarized police forces which increasingly saw themselves as a society unto themselves. Even judges, who ought to have known better, didn’t bat an eye as police referred to ordinary, lesser citizens as “civilians”.

Here’s a clue: police are civilians too. When they cease to be civilians, society is ruled by de facto martial law. That day already arrived. The grunts doing their basic “full spectrum” training in Iraq, Afghanistan and Pakistan, who do not succumb to PTSD, will be tomorrow’s “blundering constables” kicking ass on American streets.

The corporate-bankster police state is prepared. Although the snivelling, stepinfechit press doesn’t report on it, police departments around the country are armed with spy and killer drones. They are armed with slippery goo that reduces all friction and makes it impossible to stand or even sit. They are armed with sonic cannon that make such brain blasting sounds you can’t control your own bowels. They are armed with laser beams that cause “intense” agonizing burning sensations. And if anyone thinks that cops have a shred of even animal decency that would embarrass them from using these “compliance tools” on you, think again.

Photo: AP/Thomas K. Fowler

A Sha Nah Nah Revolution?

One of the truly amazing things about capitalism is its ability to trivialize anything it touches.

We never thought much of Flower Power as a political force; but we thought even less of daisy-decals stuck onto beetles, which metamorphosed into sunny smiley faces which in the end became the Walmart logo.

Similarly, we have not been very sanguine about the ultimate prospects of the Occupy Movement, the collective impulse of which strikes us as being counter-historical and slotted for failure without or without a strategic program.

Nevertheless, we would like the movement to have a fair crack at its paragraph in history even if it yields no more than les evenements of '48, '72 or 68.

Instead, the Occupy Movement has been reduced to the level of fracas at the frat house. Will Bloomberg evict the occupiers? Will the occupiers re-takey Oakland's Frank Ogawa Plaza? Whose panties will get stolen this time?

You can bet your last doughnut that the cops have been ordered not to do something stupid, outrageous and escalatory like blasting a rubber bullet into some pretty coed's eye. They have no doubt been issued strategic doses of prozac to keep their aggro levels in check. The kleptocracy wants to keep things as "sha nah nah" as possible -- good clean tussle-fun between our dear raucus kids (learning all aboout democracy) and our stern but patient campus constables.

If only we could bring back the Everly Brothers...or at least the Kingston Trio. We could turn the "movement" into a post-millenial version of occupying a telephone booth.

The worst thing that could happen to the movement is that it be turned into a cultural artifact... a street version of Beach Blanket Babylon, the "world's longest running musical revue" now going on 40 years of repeat original outrageousness. At that point middle aged couples from Iowa come to Oakland or New York to watch the occupiers do their monthly park takeover.

We have met the revolution and it is ours. None of the world leaders are loosing a night's worth of sleep over indignados or ninety-niners. They are off tete a teteting, trying to figure how much inflation to impose on us in order to save the banks.

Occupiers circa 1959

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Our Daily Belt

A very disturbing video circulating on YouTube captures a Judge William Adams, of Rockport Texas beating his then 16-year-old daughter with a belt, apparently, for violating house-rules on computer use and internet browsing. The video has been handed over to Federal prosecutors who have yet to comment on the matter.

In actuality, the video does not show anything more unusual or outrageous than what takes places cuotidianum hodie in the ordinary, average dysfunctional family unit: Dad wallops shrieking, crying, pleading daughter while a hubby-supportive and self-exculpating wife looks on and explains that daughter has brought this all upon herself.

Speaking to reporters, Judge Adams, says that the video "looks worse than it is." He should know. It's the sort of excuse he must hear every day from criminals up for sentencing.

Plus... we should not forget that supposedly innocent daughter was the one who secretly stashed away a camcorder so as to capture the whole scene... no doubt including her knowing and well-effected dramatic skills. Some victim!!

So Judge Adams yells and screams at his daughter for seven minutes straight and tells her repeatedly to lie on her stomach and (as mother puts it) take her punishment "like a grown up woman." You earned it, now take it. We all get what we deserve. Even Jesus.

Clearly, children can be disobedient, deceptive and manipulative. And when they are so chronically, what's an exasperated parent to do? What judge dipshit doesn't seem to understand is that children are just that: dependents. They are not autonomous. Everything they need, are and habituate to is a reflection of the Dominus Domi. However things got to the point where daughter felt the need to secretly tape dad reacting to whatever violation of house rules took place, the responsibility must of necessity return to source. In law, Judge, it's known as respondeat superior.

The well advised angel hesitates to tread into anyones domestic affairs; and, it is perhaps the case, that the thwacking looks worse than it really was. But it's the ice-berg beneath the surface that is causes the shudders.

If Judge Adams does this to his daughter, what must he do to his dogs?

Brrrrr.

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