The Shit that didn't Stick

Sneaky Pete sneaks out. Good riddance. But why? Just yesterday he was swearing to stay in the race to the finish. I have no inside line to his inner counsels, but to unfold my theory we have to go back to that secret DNC conclave held at one of Bernard Schwartz's billionaire hideaways.

As the New York Slime reported, centrist Democratz, including Karamela Harris and Sneaky Pete Buttigieg, were in attendance at the meeting, the topic of which was: What to do about Bernie. The Slime did not reveal what the strategy was, but subsequent events made it obvious. The centrist strategy was to fling as much shit around as it could and to hope some of it would stick. Translation: field as many “safe” and “reliable” candidates and see which one did best against Sanders. The obvious fall back position was (as we theorized at the time) that, if nothing else, the more candidates in the running, the greater the chances Bernie would never get a first ballot majority.

And so we got Casserole Charisma Amy, Karamela for the (Top) People, Uncle Blue Chip Joe and Sneaky Pete running on his overtly anti-Bernie mantras. It was the obvious hope of Deep Party that Sneaky Pete would be something of a white Obama. In fact, if Obama had been able to pass off as white there would be little difference between the two other than Pete's combat zone “uber driver” (his words) record. Both talked the down home accent to the folks down home while turning around and talking haute English to the haute folk. Both delivered endless orotund fatuous, faux homiletic platitudes that down home would be called “bullshit.” But if Karamela bombed among Blacks was there seriously any hope that a largely Baptist demographic would thrill to a white “abomination.” ? It didn't matter. Shit is shit and who knows what will end up sticking.

Well Pete did not stick. And even though he was more than willing -- determined even -- to stick around to see if he stuck or struck something, someone thought the better of it. The volt face was so sudden that one can be excused for thinking that someone's leash just got jerked and if so, who oh who, might have done the yanking? Q.E.D.

Deep Party is now banking on Uncle Joe to claim the field and take us back to the era of Retro-Normalcy. His is the less fancy bullshit. “I've been there; I've fought for you.” Never mind that it's a total lie, in South Carolina it stuck. But never fear. Sneaky Pete is an ambitious prick. He'll be around to sell his soul in order to sell the rest of us out in some way or another. If Biden could do it, why not him? Let things cure for a while. 

©barfo 2020